Botch-fest 000

Okay, I will concede that the title of this blog entry is vague, even cryptic to those in my immediate family, even those who have been privileged to have been shown my comic stories. I will begin by saying that I have found yet another purpose for my maintaining a blog, a place to complain.

Botch-fest is a kinder, gentler way of saying that I am having a complaint party here! At least in the binary world, a count generally starts with zero, so I am likewise beginning this series of posts, although not necessarily contiguous, with Botch-fest 000. Let the griping commence!

Yesterday I was trying to leave work at the Regnier Center and a woman in a white, late-model Toyota Sienna minivan was parked in front of my car! Blocked in! Without any flamboyant flourishes, like raising my arms in the air, I slowly approached the driver's side (left-hand side in North America), and motioned for her to roll down her window.
"I am parked right there," pointing to my car. A green, early-model Ford Escape was pulling up behind her van.
She answered, referring to the woman in the passenger seat, "I was just leaving her off."
"Okay," I responded and walked around the front of the van and around the back of my car.
Seated, I waited for her van to park beside me in the driving lane on the other side of the lamp pole and for the Escape to drive around her van. After that a dark red Mitsubishi Outlander came from the opposite direction and stopped, waiting for me to leave!
I had parked with the front of my car facing out of the space. After checking for anything coming from the other direction, I pulled out. I accelerated to twenty miles per hour before reaching the stop sign at the end of the lot, briefly stopped, and turned in front of a white, early 1990s' Toyota RAV-4.
Sheesh, lady, couldn't you have left her off in the circle drive in front of CLB, like any other normal person?! What an idiot!

Driving down 75th Street to my Bank of America branch on Quivira Road, a red, late-model Pontiac Grand Prix sedan changed lanes, swerving in front of me without signaling!
Later just past the Jimmy John's, a black Lincoln Mark LT pickup truck could not find the signal either, and whipped in front of me. This idiot was more stellar at the light at Quivira, not signaling when pulling into the inner left-turn lane. Then this idiot pulls into the left-turn lane at 77th Street, as I had already signaled. Finally the idiot finds the turn signal on the side street when desiring to turn left to the Phillips 66 station.

Fortunately my experience at Bank of America made up for these idiots. The teller was kind, friendly, respectful, and communicated well. My car loan payment was made quickly and easily.

The statement showing how much last year I spent on classes at ITT Technical Institute has still not yet arrived from ITT Educational Services. I need that statement for all of the money I paid in federal income tax to be returned to me! My car needs a new timing chain, like your girlfriend!